Dear Super Target

Bed Bath and Beyond must have spent as much time developing their wedding registry program as my university's student orientation program. Super Target, you have no program, no little room with pink wall paper and dinnerware displayed in the corner. You didn't send out your top salesman named Todd to teach us about the differences between Calphalon and Teflon, and why it's better to buy the expensive 8" chef's knife behind the plexiglass doors. No, Super Target, you did not do any of those things, your website refuses to let us login, and you never offered cash back on returned items, so we are leaving you. Except for a few things here or there for people who don't know what Beth Bath and Beyond is. But we're not going to like it.

posted by Cameron Lawrence at 08:41